Weekend Oriental

Friday is here, and to celebrate, sit back and relax with this Japanese school girl dancing. Well, its not so much dancing as waving her hands around, but its pretty entertaining.

Its actually part of a viral marketing campaign for the Gears of War video game, so thats why theres monster hands under the bed.

Here's to the Patriarchy

Now if we only could finish that study where it proves women nagging causes cancer.

But its a start.

Art Imitates Life

So here’s this point and counterpoint from the Onion. A girl I used to date, Jane, thought it sounded like how her and I used to talk about politics. I’ll let you guess which one she thought sounded like her and who sounded like me. At first I protested, but as I thought about it, she’s kinda right. I happen to have an old taped conversation of us talking about politics (I tape all my conversations):

Me: Hey, how’s it going?
Jane: (launches into a list of complaints about me, it goes on for a while)
Me: Umm, yeah, so anyway.
Jane: I just read this article about the war in Iraq, and it mentioned we have also invaded this place called.....umm...I think its called something foreign. Landiland? Yeah, what do you think about those wars?
Me: What? I think you mean ‘Afghanistan’, anyway they’re kinda totally different in their nature. One was pretty controversial and-
(Interupting)Jane: I cant believe we’re killing these Landilanders! Its so sad how everyone just beats up on Africa.
Me: *sighs and looks at the ceiling* We’re in Afghanistan to help-
Jane: You just say what George Bush tells you to in your little secret earpiece! You can’t defend anything you think! You’re a Nazi!
Me: *stare blankly* I’m not even sure what we’re talking about.
Jane: We’re talking about that bullets have been proven to cause climate change! We’re talking about how you support all these illegal wars! I thought you wanted to save Africa! You probably think we should just drop nukes on all the Landilanders! Murderer.
Me: Are you really in college, or just telling people that? I bet you’re an English major.
Jane: See? You can’t defend anything!
Me: You’re lucky I have an irrational attraction to Orientals.



hilarious.

The More Things Change....The More They Don't

So the Democrats have began their push for a timetable on Iraq. Its not surprising (although disgusting), since it was a major campaign issue. Whats is funny though, is that to push the bill through the House, Pelosi who pledged an end to earmarks (breath of fresh air!) allowed the bill to be populated with them. Quiting if its hard & Pork? Now thats the American way!

Im sure the 74 million for peanut storage will be put forth to good use.

Its like, the future

I saw this article a couple weeks ago and it reminded me of the security screening scene in that movie Airplane II. I can't tell you much about the movie; I was probably about twelve when I saw it. However, I did remember this part. Probably because of the boobs . . .

St. Patrick's a Queef, apparently.

sooooo ya, what be ya'lls plans for this weekend? I am awash in a sea of confusion.

Tramp Stamp=Fag Tag?

So last night I was in the Union about to go to Japan Night. In the food court part of the Union some bands were going to play & setting crap up. So Im in the bathroom and washing my hands, at the other sink is a member of whatever band getting his hair just the right amount of spikey and messy. Nothing quite sticks it to The Man like carefully crafted hair that looks like what mine looks like most of the day anyway (I dont own a comb).

Anyway, he was bending down looking into his bag, and as I was walking out I noticed he has a tattoo in that standard place sorority girls put it. Right on the small of the back! I dont think Ive ever seen a guy have one in that spot.

Here's a run down of who I deem may have tattoos:
Soldiers: Unit crest, etc. is appropiate
Oriental Gangsters: The East Asian body tattoo is a great way to let everyone know you're a high ranking Yakuza. 893 suckers!
Slaves: Nothing says "I just got conquered in battle" like some nice markings
Skanky Girls: Just go ahead & let me know without talking to you that you have "missing daddy" issues
Suspect Guys: You're really tough and hard? Thanks for letting me know. I bet you watch "Ultimate Fighting" and constantly say you could do it too right? Lucky guess.

I may have to revisit the tattoo subject, this is fun.