Kraftwerk Thanksgiving

Oh man.. this is what I shoulda had. next year its on, if I remember.

Also, a chick from that factotum movie(its really nice), became murdered.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6125832.stm

So the deal is, this dude went into her apartment, and punched her in the face, knocking her out. The dude totally thought he killed her with the punch and hung up a noose in which to hang her by. So she wasnt dead, but he thought she was and then he actually killed her by hanging, not the punch he assumed killed her. So what the hell do you charge him with?

just because

I'll be in Argentina

I'm going to argentina for an undetermined amount of time.. my flight leaves out of OKC at 10am on Dec 2nd. An ex girlfriend of mine, her grandparents have a citrus plantation near buenos aires.. and I can live there, maids, butlers, citrus. why the fuck not?

So, I've quit working (my 10 hours a week) and decided to drive all over and visit women. I agree with kari about sleeping around.. the problem is I cant do it in tahlequah, becuase I see the same god damned people everywhere, and I dont want to be "that guy". There are far too many "those dudes" here anyway, and i'm not falling into it.. i've already got a pair and a spare in tahlequah, I dont need anymore.

So I decided to go visit a girl in colorado, amazing woman, i'd live with her if she wasnt 12 hours away. Her parents loved me, we had champagne at the country club.. I love colorado springs.. she's super amazing, and fucking gorgeous. So, I left there with a smile on my face and headed to denver.. spend 3 days with an amazing greek girl whom I had only met once before.. drank wine in the snow.. ate well, did our thing. Left her and went to durango.. Tahlequah Jr. I didnt have any girls that I planned on have "maximum cuddles" with, but I was on this kick.. and soon found an interum companion. I was fucking happy. I drive down to socorro to meet with an old girlfriend, drink beer on the rio grande, eat mexican food, play golf.. great. Left her for OKC, met a girl I only knew from online, and she was really really amazinly hot... perfect. I only spent one night with her because the next morning, I woke up to piss, and behind her mirror were about 20 bottles of various meds.. and then she told me she was bi-polar, and painted me this canvas with her tits. I have it in my room now, actually. I fled that scene to fayetteville...

So jane.. the girl I had written about a while back, she's gone and there are two girls staying in her place.. one girl I know, and have no intentions of ever boneing... the other, has internet sex all day, is like, 4'11, and blonde.. yeah.. I'm going to see her, and my favorite ex.. who lives there now. I get to jane's apartment and the entire place is ridden with house flies.. sooooo gross.. and it smells.. these girls are NOT taking care of the place. Its gross.. we dont go out, i drink my hendricks gin, get sloshy, and the blonde takes me to a bedroom.. this is a tiny apartment, thin walls, i find out later, so i'm on this gross ass bed with no sheets, flies everywhere and this slutty ass woman.. i cant handle it and throw her on the floor. I have this "warming" ky.. and I was kinda angry at the entire situation.. so i slathered up my johnson and threw it in her ass to the hilt. there wasnt much resistance, I must say, but she fucking SCREAMED. So I took it out, like a gentleman, and she screamed, "PUT IT BACK IN BITCH". So, me, a little scared, complied.. and pumped her ass full of weiner gravy. i get done and she turns around and sucks the living hell out of my shitty dick. I felt so gross after all this I showered (with flies) and drove to my ex, the most pure attractive girl i've ever seen, and fell asleep with her. i spent the next two days with her, no sex, just drinking wine on mountains...

Came back to tahlequah, and have been in my house for 3 days now, only left to go get tested. And fucking yesterday morning at like 9am, my spare, of the "pair and a spare" walked over to my house, still drunk, hasnt slept, to bone down. There were still people passed out in my house.. and i railed her, loudly waking my guests up. Maybe there is no hope.. I'm just waiting for thanksgiving and then my flight out..

Oh, art show in OKC Dec 1st, free cocktails and wine, make it if you can!

-Steven Paul

I'm in love with a stripper?

Before I tell my story, there are a few things that need to be known.

1. I'm a hoe. I enjoy sleeping around. I find it to be fun and I don't have any apologies about it.
2. Read Number 1.

So, Saturday the 11th, a few friends and I were innocently having a game night. Yes, a game night. It involved heated games of Battleship, UNO, Yahtzee, and Scattegories. It was then 10:30 PM and we realized it was still way early, so we could go out to the bars. We hop in to my car, still with no destination in mind. Then I say, "Hey guys. We could go to the strip club! They have male and female dancers on Saturday night, so everyone is happy." My friends agreed, and on to PT's we went.

Of course, I go around to all the different tables, checking out the ladies. I get a couple of dollar dances, life is good. Then I sit at a table. I have my dollar ready, and this stripper has a smoking body, so I have a smile on my face. Of course, she's flirting with me because that's what strippers do. I don't really think anything of it until she has her legs wrapped around the guy beside me while leaning over and talking to me. Here is the dialogue:

Stripper: "Hey, do you have your cell phone on you?"
Me: "Yep."
Stripper: "Type in this number (and she gives me the number). That's my cell phone number. Give me a call so I have yours. I want to take you home tonight."
Me: "Sounds like a plan."

That was the extent of the conversation. I take my friends home, she calles me and gives me directions to her house. When I get there, she has a fire going, two wine glasses, and a bottle of wine. I know, ridiculous, right? So, we have sex in front of her fireplace. Being the "man" that I am, I leave promptly at 6:30 AM because there's no way in hell I'm spending the night. I'm thinking, hoping, that I can get away with never speaking to her again. But, she called me ALL WEEK LONG, trying to get together.

So, on Thursday night, we go to a concert. I tell her I'm not really in the mood for going out, so she pays for my ticket to the show and my drinks all night. It was pretty sweet. Then, we go out to one of the bars near my house, where I run in to two of the girls I've hooked up with over the past month or so. And they see me with this super hot chick who's all over me. Once again, it was pretty sweet. Then, we went back to my apartment. Good times.

There are some funny things I haven't mentioned about her yet. I think she might be on drugs. No, I'm pretty sure she's on something. The bitch would not shut up! I felt like I needed one of those "wrap it up" machines from the Chappelle's show. Really, she needed to shut the hell up. I think she was popping one too many pills. And, she would not quit smoking. Chain smoking like a motherfucker. And sometimes her stories didn't make any sense. It was quite amusing, actually.

So all in all, I'm not in love with a stripper. But let me leave you with some last thoughts, provided by T-Pain:

"She poppin she rollin she rollin
She climbin that pole and
Im N Luv with a stripper
She trippin she playin she playin
Im not goin nowhere girl im stayin
Im N Luv with a stripper"